1 – APRIL
The Sex Talk
By Dr. Marwan Jaber
I came to the USA when I was 10 years old when my family left Lebanon in 1982, in an attempt to get
away during the war. I always knew I wanted to be a doctor, from a very young age. I am married to the love of my life, Rolla Abdul-Chalk, who shares my love of medicine. She is also a physician and has chosen dermatology as her field. We have two beautiful children, Kareem & Eva, I
only hope that I can instill in them the same values, appreciation for life, and give them the same opportunities that our parents gave us. We currently live in Virginia.
As an emergency room physician, I have treated so many types of One particular scenario that I time and time again is that of problems. have seen
teenage pregnancy. This issue has always been a difficult one for me to deal with because of the fact that with some education and more involved parenting, so many of these situations could be avoided.
It is very easy to take the position that these issues affect only low income families or broken homes and think that,
“This could never However this is far remember treating a
fifteen years old who
was brought into
parents. She had been complaining abdominal pain for five days.
After speaking to the child in private, I discovered that she had missed her period the month prior and surprisingly had been sexually active since the age of thirteen. She had not been using any protection, and had already had many episodes of sexually transmitted diseases that her parents were unaware of. My interactions with this young woman made it very evident to me that she was very immature
in her thinking
control or about the
consequences of having relationship with someone.
between this family and to learn that the parents had not spent any time discussing anything about sex with their daughter.
At fifteen, they still thought that their little girl was too young for the “sex talk”, but to their dismay, all of her friends and her had been having sex for years. She told her parents that her friends had all
been having sex, too, and she didn’t see
what the big deal was. The mother appeared very aggravated about the situation and was yelling at her daughter stating that she got herself into this situation
and that she
get herself out
of it. The
uninvolved. Her situation required
medical surgery ectopic
pregnancy, but her treatment did not end there, for there would certainly be long lasting emotional and social repercussions.
T h e r e a s o n I t e l l t h i s s t o r y , i s t h a t i t that people, culture, are brings up especially issues our many from
it is socially
unacceptable to talk to their kids about sex, or they are embarrassed to do so. Some may feel that if they talk to their kids
can talk with their parents about the subjects. They are less likely to have sexual intercourse as a teen, less likely to become pregnant or get someone pregnant, and more likely to talk to their parents about other important issues in
personal maturity and a great amount of insight before venturing
s exu al
to know we
be there for
no matter what!
intercourse since the outcomes of a short period of gratification can result in very serious outcomes. The social, growth of the
people directly and indirectly involved in these actions will be affected.
I encourage parents to openly talk about these issues with their children. Kids are exposed to sexual issues at a very early age through the media, their
school, and their friends. educate our kids on these will learn from someone parents cannot be with our second of the day.
If we do not matters, they else. We as children every
After examining her and completing a few studies, she was found to have an ectopic pregnancy. This is a condition in which a pregnancy begins outside of its
normal location in the continues to grow there.
uterus and It is a very
serious condition, which almost always requires surgical intervention, and can lead to death if not treated soon enough.
After speaking to the
parents and everyone
obviously very distraught.
I was so
about sex, have sex.
their kids will be more likely to Others just assume that their
kids are sex until
“good kids” and just won’t have they are married because that is
what they are suppose to do.
My goal is to educate people that knowledge is good, and that ignorance leads to many problems. Study after study has shown that kids who feel that they can talk with their parents about sex are less likely to engage in high-risk behaviors as teens than kids who do not feel that they
Our job is not to make our kids scared of us, but to create a trusting and comfortable relationship. We have a responsibility to our children to teach them our values and ideals, but we also have a
responsibility to educate them. point they will make their own and the more knowledge they better decisions they will make.
At some decisions, have, the Instead of
to your children and let them know can come to you about anything.
“CIVILIZATION HAS NO MEANING BUT THROUGH THE DISCIPLINE OF OUR THOUGHTS, FEELINGS, AND BEHAVIORS…”