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7 / 14

:: 7 ::

  • Hey baby there's a party in my pants and you are invited!

  • Do you like chicken? Sorry, I haven't got any, how about a cock?

  • (Look down at your crotch) It's not just going to suck itself.

  • (Hold up a screw) Wanna screw?

  • Smile! It is the second best thing you can do with your lips.

  • Your shirt has to go, but you can stay.

  • Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It is just like a French kiss, but down under.

  • Could you do me a favor? Could you get on your knees and smile like a donut?

  • Do you want to come over to my place and feed your beaver some wood?

  • Do you believe guys think with their dick? (Yeah.) Well, in that case, will you blow my mind?

  • If I washed my dick, would you suck it? (No) Oh, so you like to suck dirty dicks.

  • There are 265 bones in the human body. How would you like one more?

  • "I have this magic watch that can actually talk to me. Seriously, it's saying something right now. It says that you're not wearing any underwear, is that true?" (No) "Oh wait, my watch is an hour fast!

  • This is a condom. If we put it on, we can have sex.

  • You know how they say skin is the largest organ? Not in my case.

  • Do you believe in free love? (No) Then how much for a blowjob?

  • Fuck me if I'm wrong, but I could swear you were Julia Roberts.

  • Hey baby, I'll fuck you so well, the NEIGHBORS will be having a cigarette when we're done.

  • I'll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle...

  • Want to make a porno? We don't have to tape it...

  • You must be a high jumper, because you make my bar rise!

  • If I'm a pain in your ass... We can just add more lubricants...

  • You are so beautiful that I want to be reincarnated as your child so that I can breastfeed by you until I'm 20.

  • Do you live on a chicken farm? (No) You sure know how to raise cocks.

  • Why don't you come over here, sit on my lap and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up?

  • That's a nice shirt. Can I talk you out of it?

  • Seriously honey, sex is like Pizza. Even if it’s bad, it still pretty darn good...

  • That shirt's very becoming on you. If I were on you, I'd be coming too.

  • Do I know you from somewhere? Because I don't recognize you with your clothes on

  • Forget that! Playing doctor is for kids! Let's play gynecologist.

  • Your Daddy must have been a baker, cause you got the nicest set of buns I've ever seen.

  • Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears? )Pull your pockets inside out( Would you like to?

  • Is it that cold out or are you just smuggling tic-tacs?

  • I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?

  • Hey babe, how about a pizza and a fuck? (No) What's wrong, don't you like pizza?

  • Someone vacuum my lap, I think this girl needs a clean place to sit.

  • Hi, I'm the new Milkman. Do you want it in the front or the back?

  • Hey Baby! I'd like to use your thighs as earmuffs.

  • You are so selfish! You're going to have that body the rest of your life and I just want it for one night.

  • Do you have a mirror in your pocket? (Why?) Because I can see myself in your pants.

  • Screw me if I am wrong, but haven't we met before?


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