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Here are some things you can do to help the back and forth between homes go more smoothly for both your kids and you:

Make sure your kids know the schedule and when they will be going from one house to the other.

Re-assure them that it’s good for them to spend time with both of their parents.

Your kids need to know that it’s okay to love and see both parents, and they need to hear that from both of you!

Work together with the other parent to come up with a visitation schedule that will allow your kids to spend as much time as possible with each parent.

Here are some things you should NOT do:

Don’t change the visitation schedule or time without working it out with the other parent first.

Don’t panic, get angry, or feel insulted if your kids cry and ask for the other parent during your time with them. Just ask them if they would like to call the other parent. Sometimes, children (especially young children) just need to make sure the other parent is still there.

Don’t send your new boyfriend or girlfriend or spouse to pick the kids up or leave them in charge of the kids for long periods of time – this is especially important early in the new relationship.

Don’t use your kids as messengers between parents (to send bills, notes, or anything else). It’s very hard on children to be put in the middle of their parents’ relationship.

Don’t press your kids for information about their visits with the other parent. This will lessen their enjoyment of the visit and put them in the middle of your adult relationship. It’s fine to ask how the visit went, just


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