GATEWAY TO HAPPINESS
you give up your unrealistic demands for absolute certainty, you will be able to have the same peace of mind as if you were certain. Even in extremely important areas of our lives we are likely to be uncertain. While it is worthwhile to be as certain as possible, as long as you accept your uncertainty you will not exacerbate your situation.
4.7 Focus on doing what you can do. Not on what you can’t do. When you try to do communal work, focus on what you can do. Not on what you can’t do. Realizing you are not responsible for what is beyond your control, will enable you to keep your peace of mind.
If you feel an urge to personally complete the job, you will feel a heavy burden and possibly overwhelming anxiety. The attitude that will allow you to have peace of mind while forging ahead is to feel a sense of responsibility to do what you can while at the same time realizing there are many external factors that might prevent you from succeeding completely. Keep your focus on trying to accomplish with the best of your ability.
Quieting your inner chatter.
Our thoughts are not under our direct control to the degree that our behavior is.
A person’s mind is constantly busy and does not stay focused on any one topic. The first skill you need to master to have control of your thoughts is to remove all distractions and confusion and to concentrate on one subject. (Toras Avraham,
For peace of mind you need to learn the skill of quieting the constant chatter that
is going on in your mind. Try to calmly keep your mind focused on one thought, while gently stopping other thoughts from entering. Practice doing this for short periods and keep increasing the amount of time.
3. Every occurrence and situation in our lives can be utilized for elevation and growth. When a person’s main focus is growth, he will be able to have peace of mind regardless of what the specific situation is. (Darkai Mussar, p.186)
4. Keep repeating to yourself some slogan that will be able to supply you with continuous encouragement. One possibility is, “I have the ability to overcome trivial disturbances, bad or good.” (Cheshbon Hanefesh, ch.1)
PEACE OF MIND