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By speaking openly about the abuse and expressing a desire for change, a victim may be able to better gage the offender’s heart and real intent, and whether he wants to provide the respect and concern needed in a relationship.  It is also the first step in setting healthy boundaries.  In Matthew 18:15-17, Jesus gives instructions for confronting those who abuse us. It demonstrates the use of progressively increasing levels of accountability and boundaries. This 4-step procedure also provides increasingly stringent safety measures, including staying away from the abuser.  Though Jesus encourages us to speak up about others’ offenses against us, He wants us to be safe.  In Deuteronomy 30:19, the Lord says through Moses, “I have set before you life and death, ….Now choose life, so that you and your children may live….”

Questions:

1.

What safety measures are built into each step of Jesus’ 4-step procedure in Matthew 18:15-17?

2.

What are some other ways to keep a safe distance when having to communicate with an unsafe person?  

3.  Look at the following “Relationship Wheels.”  What are your thoughts and feelings after reading the wheel on the left?   The one on the right?

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