Some parents are able to find positive effects, albeit muted ones, from the abduction. These include:
. . . .
a heightened awareness of family conflicts, greater personal knowledge, greater understanding of human nature, an increased ability to see things from the other person’s
perspective, an inducement to recognise what is really important and to spend more time with those who matter.
The only area in which there was an apparent connection between the effects of the abduction and the issues set out in the current heading was in the existence of new relationships for the parents concerned. 12 of the 25 parents interviewed had formed new relationships, only 1 of these resulting in marriage. Several of these 12 interviewed parents felt that the effects of the abduction informed the new relationship, highlighting the suspicion and lack of trust which they now felt, resulting in an unwillingness to fully commit to the relationship, even where
15 of the 22 cases concerned married parents, 6 cases concerned unmarried parents and it was not known in the other case whether the parents had been married or not. Unsurprisingly, there did not appear to be any correlation between the marital status of the parents and the severity of the effects suffered. Similarly, there was no apparent connection between the ages of those interviewed and the extent of the effects suffered.
Although these are important effects, they are dwarfed by the enormity of the sentiments expressed above and were, in all cases, offered by way of contrast to the detailed deleterious effects already described by the parents concerned.
We considered whether any of the above issues impacted on the effects of abduction.
Age, Marital Status and New Relationships: