Pharaoh’s next pitch was a curveball, . . . causing Moses to spin around with the staff before hitting it to the right side of the audience, . . . making the females on that side turn into mooing
cows . . . and the males into neighing horses. . . . But the ball continued to curve to the left side of the audience, turning them into a repulsive and grotesque disease, . . . which swarmed around the cows and horses, . . . breathing in their faces . . . and causing them to slump over and die, frozen in really weird postures
weirder than that even. . . .
The ball continued to curve around the room, hitting Pharaoh on the
side of the head, . . . itch uncontrollably, . . . . . his armpits, . . .
the other side— . . . causing him to
. with ugly festering boils all over his neck, his kneecaps, . . . and his rear end, . . .
which caused the audience to become grossed out . . . and made Moses sing out his tune again: . . .
Cue: Moses [Sing this to the tune of “Louie, Louie.”]
Pharaoh, Pharaoh Ohhh baby, let my people go. Ugh!
Pharaoh was getting really agitated . . . and began jumping up and down, screaming bad things in Egyptian. . . . Moses tossed the staff to Aaron, . . . who pointed it at the left side of the audi- ence, causing them to stomp their feet so loud it sounded like thun- der. . . . Then he pointed it at the right side, . . . causing them
to slap their laps so fast it sounded like hail falling down. . . . The
noise got louder . . . and louder,
. . . until Aaron called for a
rain delay by waving the staff back and forth, . . complete silence . . . for three days. . . .
. bringing about
Just when Pharaoh thought the game was over, Moses tossed a ball to Aaron, who smacked it with the staff, turning everyone into wild
and crazy locusts . . . hopping and buzzing all around the room , . . . and messing up people’s hair. . . . Then Moses and Aaron
led everyone in singing to Pharaoh one more time: . . .
The Exodus–Part 1